Piss Off Your Neighbors

Do you have the kind of neighbors that crapify their landscaping with statues of flamingos, trolls, and deer? If so then this is the product for you.

This is a full size replica of a Camarasaurus. This thing is 19' tall, 55' long and tips the scales at 3000 lbs. (assuming my conversions are correct, damned metric system).

The price for all of this prehistoric goodness is only $55,221.58. Only problem is the this is offered by a UK retailer so I imagine shipping cost will be a bastard.

Via Oh Gizmo!
Product Page

Taking to the Sky.

I was planning to take a boat over to Alcatraz on my first 24 hour trip but then I stumbled on to this page.

As you can see from the picture this nut, John Ninomiya, ties himself to a bunch of helium balloon and launches himself into the air.

I would totally like to try this but I am sure it would take a ton of balloons to get my fat ass off the ground.

First Trip - Locked In

My first 24 hour trip is scheduled. I am really squeezing this one in under the wire for the 24 hours stipulation. I land at 11:02P Friday and takeoff at 11:00P Saturday giving me 2 minutes to spare.

I am not going to get a hotel room, I figure I can just bounce around until 9A when my tour starts. I may however rent a car since I can get a crappy one for $30 it will probably be cheaper than cabbing it.

Crazy Brits

Richard Wilson, an absolutely mental artist, has come up with brilliant piece of of "art". Oh and by brilliant I mean total crap.

This dude cut a slice out of a building and stuck a motor on it to make it rotate. The best part is it only cost a million dollars, not counting the increased heating/cooling cost and the cost of the exterminator to get all of the bugs and birds out once the show is over.

Check out the video below. Once you see it in action you might find some meaning in the piece. I know I did it says "Richard Wilson is a bloody buffoon".

What's Happening. (Weekend of 06/08)

Zippity Zoo Doo - 6/8 - 6P - Yet another zoo event, if you have not noticed by now I like the zoo. This one is pricey and I have never been to it so I don't know if it rocks or not. Tickets run $200 per person so I think I am going to skip it this year. If someone does attend let me know how it is.



Zoo Support - This is not a official event but the weekend weather is supposed to be awesome so get out and walk around the zoo. I'll be there Saturday for sure and I recommend buying a season pass. It only cost $50 and it gets you and a guest in free for a year.

Cavs Finals - The retarded NBA scheduled all of the games with a 9P tip off and none of the games are on a weekend night (Friday/Saturday). There is a game this Sunday 6/10 @ 9P, bullshit.

Cavs Win!

In case you have not heard the Cavs are advancing to the NBA Finals.

I would like to thank them for a great season and giving me a good reason to party my ass off for at least 4 more games.

iPhone Unboxing and Hands On Review!

Coming soon, hopefully.

I emailed Steve Jobs and asked him if he would send me out an iPhone so I could do a full write up on it. I sent the email yesterday and I am kind of surprised he did not overnight one to me. I am thinking I should have it in the next few days.

Stay tuned.

New Feature! 24 HourTrips.

Starting this month I'll be taking one trip per month to tourist/fun locations around the country (United States only for now, at least until my passport comes in). The thing that will be different about my trips is that, in the spirit of Jack Bauer, I will spend no more than 24 hours at the location of the month.

I figured this would be a good way to check out popular sites without all the fuss of taking time off work, booking hotels, packing bags, renting cars (I should be able to cab it most of the time) and finding restaurants. Plus I am not the kind of guy that needs to stare at something for hours but I would like to see it in person and snap a few pictures.

My first trip will be to Alcatraz. I may be heading out as soon as this Saturday 6/9. I found a flight that gets me to San Fransisco @ 10A and a return flight that leaves @ 11P. I also found a website that will let me book the Alcatraz tour and a 1 hour bay boat tour. I should also have time to stop at the In N Out burger near Jones Street. I know it is on Jefferson St., I said "NEAR Jones St."

Of course I will post my experiences and pictures of the trips and probably let you know if it was worth it. I already have several trip ideas in mind but post your suggestions in the comments.

What's Happening. (Weekend of 06/01)

Downtown Cleveland will be the place to be this Saturday. The Cavs and the Indians are both playing Detroit at home Saturday. The Indians Start @ 7P and the Cavs @ 8:30P. There will be plenty of pre and post game fun at the bars on 9th, Panini's and The Clevelander are my favorites (see photo). See you down there.

Oh yeah, be careful after the Cavs' game, since it is on TNT Chuck Barkley will be in town and he is known for tossing people through windows.

Bald Eagle -5, Mark - 0

As you may or may not know bald eagles are nesting in Cuyahoga Valley National Park near Station Road Bridge Trailhead. The nest is on the propery of Cleveland Metroparks Brecksville Reservation within the boundary of the national park. For the past couple of weeks I have been trying to get a glimpse of the bird with no success.

The nest area is located 1/2 mile North of the Station Road parking lot. I put together a Google map if you want to check it out for yourself. I am going to keep trying, it has to be very impressive to see a bird with a 7 foot wing span flying around. I'll post pictures if I ever track it down.

Bald Eagle Info
PDF Link

Whales to be Rescued by Hosers

I am not talking about some dorks from Canada but people using fire hoses.

Two humpback whales wandered 70 miles from the Pacific Ocean up the Sacramento River. The two whales, a mother and her calf, became disoriented and are now circling in the river.

Biologists attempted to use sounds of killer whales and clanging pipes to chase the whales back to the ocean with no results. There was no mention of using the sound of Japanese fishing boats but I would guess that would have made the toughest whale turn tail and run.

They are now going to turn fire hoses on the huge mammals to drive them back to the ocean . This is the first time something like this will be attempted and I am willing to bet they got the idea from the Chinese that used the hoses to knock that murderer from his perch.

I hope all goes well and the whales are returned safely to the ocean but I don't see how squirting water at an animal that lives in the water is going to get the job done.

Full Story

What's Happening. (Weekend of 05/25)

Berea's Rib Burn Off - This event runs all weekend @ Cuyahoga County Fair Grounds
Friday, Noon to 11:00P Free.
Saturday & Sunday 11:00A to 11:00P.$5.00 until 7:00PM $8.00 after 7:00PM.
Monday,11:00AM to 9:00PM $2.00.
Entertainment- Saturday, 9:00PM Billie Currington. Sunday, 9:00PM Gin Blossoms.
Free Parking.

Cavs Playoffs - Sunday 8P @ The Q (What a lame name) - The Cavs are in the finals for the first time since 92' so head downtown and party your ass off. If the weather cooperates I'll be bouncing around down there well before the tip off.

Bow Wow - Sunday 6P @ The Nautica Pavilion - Lil' is all grown up and still pleasing crowds with his musical rhymes.

Gas Prices

As we all have seen in the last couple years gas prices have gone up and I am getting sick of it.

I am sick of it because I can't stand listening to all of the jackasses talking about it. The daily chatter around my office is mind-numbing. I hear things like "did you hear there are people that can't eat because of the high gas prices" and "those bastard oil companies make billions why are they charging us so much". Hey, if can company can make money selling a product I say "good show".

Of course my favorite is the email calling for a gas boycott on a certain day. What a joke, guess what retards, if everyone could go without gas the prices would already be lower. It is a little thing called supply and demand you should have learned about it in 9th grade economics.

So please people shut up about the gas prices for now. If they hit double digits then you can start crying again.

Niagara Falls Weather Report: Looks Like Rain

I have to head up to Canada for a bachelor party this weekend so I am sure the weather inside the peelers will be rainy.

This, That and The Other, One of Them is the Bible.

Rocker Prince is going to hang up his guitar and pick up the bible when he finishes his London concert tour later this year. Prince said "I just need to take some time off for study and travel." When asked what he was studying, he replied: "The Bible."Also a PR company helping to publicise the tour, said in a statement that Prince would be performing his greatest hits "for the very last time".

Damn U Prince, How can you stop playing your greatest hits? That is your best stuff. Let's Work this out buddy. You never know what The Future will bring, how can you say you will never play them again.

I Hate U, you must be Delirious from all of your touring. Come On just take a break after this tour, get yourself rested on The Holy River. Then once you are well rested Let's Go Crazy and have a greatest hits tour in America.

I guess this is just a Sign "O" the Times when a great musician leaves his Days Of Wild behind and turns to the Bible. The Truth is I can't blame the guy. I mean if I was livin The Good Life for all these years I would need a break also. Still ,Prince, once you get back from hearing the Thunder of God on Mountains of Sinai you have to go back on tour! And I Betcha by Golly Wow your show will be the Jam of the Year.

What's Happening. (Weekend of 05/11)

While I am sure there is plenty of stuff going on this weekend I have to take the weekend off. The last few weeks have been a real blur. I don't remember much but I know I was having fun and spending tons of cash. So this weekend I am just going to crash, I am looking forward to about 30 hours of sleep, 5 times more than I normally get in a weekend. If there are any note worthy events this weekend post them in comments.

You Asked for a Miracle, I Give You the F.B.I.

The F.B.I. foiled a plot by Islamic Radicals to kill soldiers at Fort Dix in New Jersey.

I am very happy that the F.B.I. was able to stop this before it happened but these have to be some of the dumbest terrorist ever. Their plan and training methods are laughable. Check out these quotes from the F.B.I.'s statement.

"Their alleged intention was to conduct an armed assault on the army base and to kill as many soldiers as possible,". Wow, that is ingenious if I understand it correctly. Let's attack one of the bases of the most powerful army on earth with some rifles.

"They played paintball and test-fired weapons,". This one speaks for itself, just plain retarded.

Again I am glad the attack never happen but I think this quote sums it up well.

While authorities are glad to have arrested them, the individuals are "hardly hard core terrorists," one law enforcement source said.

Beer Pong

I beat the guy in the video below in beer pong this weekend. Unfortunately we did not have cameras rolling. You can see how skilled he is, just know I beat him so that means I am even better.

Save the Date

Arrr, this is a ways off but I thought it is worth mentionin'. September 19th is International Talk Like a Pirate Day. So brush up on your fa'orite pirate phrases, it will be har before you know it.

The only thin' that will trump this is the, yet t' be scheduled, International Pipe Talk day.

A pence for an old man o'de sea?

More Info

Smoking Kills

The internet version 2.

As you may or may not know there is a new internet out there. Internet 2, which was built for speed, is still very much in its infant stage. So infant in fact that it does not have the redundancy that makes the real internet the internet. This lack of redundancy is what allowed a Boston area ragamuffin to bring internet 2 to its knees.

This careless hobo discarded his cancer stick on to a mattress under a bridge. The mattress eventually caught fire and melted a fiber optic cable. This cable was a key link between Boston and New York. Officials expect to have the cable repaired in 48 hours.

Frank Sanmocker, an engineer with MCI, questioned "Why was this hobo wasting his money on smokes ? He should be using that money for food or shelter. Also if I was homeless I would use a mattress to sleep on, not as an ash tray. What was he thinking?"

I have an answer for you Frank. If the vagabond was a good decision maker he probably would not be homeless. Just a my 2 cents.

On Sale Now

Tickets for Twilight at the Zoo went on sale May 1st. This is the best event at the zoo every year. Get your tickets now because they sell out fast.

More Info - scroll down
Buy Tickets

Business 2.Uh Oh

Business 2.0, the tech savvy business magazine published by Time, does not follow their own advise.
On Monday April 23 the magazine's editing system crashed wiping out the June issue. Apparently the back up server failed to back up.
"If it had happened a week later, we would have been in trouble," said Josh Quittner, the editor.
"The text had all been copy-edited and sent off to the lawyers, so it had been saved as e-mail," Quittner said. "But the page layouts were truly gone, and our heroic art department had to rebuild all the art assets."
I can't believe something like this would happen to a national tech magazine in 2007. I back up my important data in two places, one local and one off site, and I don't have any thing all that important. Lucky for them their art department is so "heroic" because clearly the IT department is not.

What's Happening. (Weekend of 05/04)

An Evening in the Amazon - 05/04 - 6P - 10P - Cleveland Zoo Rain Forest - Another zoo event! This one is an auction to benefit the Cleveland Ad Association's scholar ship fund. Price is $40, food and beverages are provided. Not sure if there will be booze but I always enjoy kicking around the zoo after hours.

Cinco de Mayo Party - 05/05 - 6P - 9:30P - Blind Pig W. 6th - $20 bucks gets you all the Coronas and tacos you can handle for 3 hours.

Finally!

The bridge was finally destroyed yesterday.
I have to say it was worth the multiple trips and delays. The blast lasted about 5 seconds but it was much louder and more visual than I expected it to be. I figured there would just be a couple of muffled bangs and the thing would crumble. As you can see in the video the left side of the bridge was really blasted. Unfortunately the video does not give you a feel for the actual power of the blast.

Bridge Demolition Update

Looks like they will give it another go today (5/1) at 6P. The viewing area is the same as before. Thunder storms are predicted for this afternoon and officials are concerned that lightening could cause problems.